How to handle criticism and correction.

Criticism and correction are two very hard things to receive.  Often we find ourselves on the defensive in either of these situations.  In fact some people fail to understand the difference between the two and do not know how to handle or respond to them.   It is on my heart today to share some of what God has taught me over the years on these issues.

The Critic ...  Often people in ministry especially seem to encounter this person.  They never seem to be happy with you, they find fault it seems in everything.  So often we tend to write such people off as those who just do not like or support us.  We describe them as difficult, complainers, antagonistic and negative.  They tend to be painted with a brush that places them in a camp of people who have no value to add and only cause problems or issues.   I am not going to say that there is no truth in any of that sentiment but I have come to realize that often people are mis-understood and the more they are mis-understood and they feel that no one is listening to them, they fall into a pattern of trying to be heard.  Often this pattern comes across as very negative and harsh.  Sure there are some that truly are just against us for some reason but many people labeled that way I think are unjustly labeled because of our lack of dealing with things properly.

When we interact with someone perceived as the Critic, we need to take some time to hear them, even if they are upset and we think they are totally off base.  They need to be heard and we need to listen to them for the nuggets of Truth rooted in what they are saying.  Even if someone has poor delivery of the information, there may be some Truth to it.  So we are first to listen to them.

Second we are to ponder what they are saying and truly ask ourselves and God if this is true and if it is then how am I to respond and if it is not how am I to respond.  We must take some time and not respond in a reactive defensive way.  If there is even a small amount of Truth present in the message we have received we need to acknowledge that and express what we intend to do about it.  The portions of the message that we believe are not valid need to be exposed as such, but in as loving and gracious a way as possible.

Third we must pray for the person who has brought this forward, that God would give them proper insight, patience and grace for others and that they would seek to honor God and learn how to interact with others in a healthy way.

The Correcter ... When we receive correction it is important that we not confuse it with criticism.  Too often people feel threatened by even loving and gentle correction and respond poorly.  Biblical Correction is always to be done in love and with grace for the person being corrected.  It is to follow much prayer and study to ensure that the correction is given properly.  When we receive this type of correction we need to respond positively with repentance and a desire to move in a fresh direction.  If you believe that the correction is not based on Truth and is incorrect then you must not get upset and defensive but rather you must expose any lies or mis-representations and proclaim Truth in return with grace and love for the other person.  Make sure you are walking in humility to receive correction properly, or we can sometimes place ourselves in a sinful prideful state by setting out our arguments of defense and winning over our corrector to see our side even if we are in the wrong.  Correction can come not because of our lack of Truth or Logic but because we may have a delivery that causes hurt or division with others.  So we must be even more receptive to correction in a healthy way so we can grow and not continue to hurt others.

Just like criticism can be unfounded so can correction, but both need to be dealt with properly.  I know this blog is not exhaustive on these matters and I do not consider myself an expert.  Rather I have had to learn a lot of these things the hard way, because I was critical, because I was prideful and did not receive correction well.  God can work in your life as He has in mine and crush a heart of stone and replace it with a heart of tender flesh.  

Keep short accounts with each other and walk in love.  Extend forgiveness for the wrongs done and the hurts caused.  If God has saved you and your accuser as well, then the same Spirit resides in you both and is grieved when we fail to show humility, grace and love toward one another.

Let us walk together

Pastor Bruce

I will Love God

I will love the Lord my God with all my heart and with all my soul and with all my mind.

This was what we ended the sermon with today, a statement of commitment to really and truly LOVE God.  Not some emotional roller coaster but a true commitment to living my life with my primary, first love, being God.  This needs to be far more than a simple statement or understanding.  This is more than a desire to go to Church or to give more of my money or time.  It is a shift in thinking, in attitude that should affect my whole life.

If I am to live this commitment to Love God more, then my life will change.  My decisions and priorities will reflect what is real to me.  If my time and energy is all eaten up by work and playing hockey, then I am probably not living this commitment.  However if out of living this commitment, I also work hard as a testimony of what God has done and is doing in my life and play some hockey keeping in mind the testimony i have on and off the ice and how I can honor my Lord in this endeavor, then maybe I am following this concept of loving God truer and deeper than I have before.

Maybe it is not based on what I do so much as what I will not do.  So I have decided to make myself a list to remind me of my commitment.

1. I will not put my work, family or friends in the spot of first priority in my life, God and only God should ever be in that position.
2. I will not live my life according to my own selfishness or the thinking of the world, God and His Word (the Bible) will be my guide and standard for living.
3. I will not abuse the time, talents and treasures that God has given to me, I will use all of who I am in service to Him and Him alone.
4. I will not worship other gods, people, things or ideas, including myself, the true God, Creator and Redeemer, deserves my worship and only Him.
5. I will not live in a pride filled state, I will seek to live in humility, repenting of my sins especially as I find myself not living up to this list.

Maybe your list would look different?  But I hope that you will join me in a fresh commitment to truly, from the core of you, love God.  Hold nothing back from Him, He will not turn you away if you submit yourself to His Lordship.

Let us walk together, setting our focus on our one true love,  Jesus - the Creator God of all things, our Savior & Lord.

Pastor Bruce

Love God - Glorify God

Today I am pondering the worship of God.  The Bible in the book of Philippians chapter 2 verses 9 through 11 says this ... 

God has  highly exalted him and bestowed on him  the name that is above every name,  so that at the name of Jesus  every knee should bow,  in heaven and on earth and under the earth,  and  every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is  Lord, to the glory of God the Father. (ESV)

As I consider the challenge we have received from Jesus to "Love God", I begin to consider what that means, how do I do that?  My mind turns to passages like the one from Philippians above and I think about worship.  To Love God must include worship.  If we Love god we will demonstrate our Love in worship.  This will include our Sunday morning service, our singing, our prayer, our reading of the Bible, our hearing the teaching and preaching of the Word, but also a whole lot more. 

My Love for God is to display the Lordship of Jesus in my life. This is about a life of worship, not just a time of worship.  Everything I do is to be in worship, displaying my Love for God.  My thoughts conclude that this must be a part of my Love of God.  

Then I realize that I do not measure up to this.  I am not perfect in living a life of worship.  I am not even close.  I cannot even perfect a time of worship.  I find myself distracted and wound up in the wrong mindset.  Too often treating worship as something that "feeds me".  Something that is about what "I like".  Yet it is not supposed to be about me at all.  It is supposed to be about God.  About worshiping Him.  About His honor and glory.  Not about my preference, my style, my comfort.  Worship, like my life, is to be all about Love for God.

And so I sense conviction.  Conviction that I need to humbly walk in repentance for my self-centered attitudes.  Conviction that I need to seek to Love God more and more.  Conviction that the more I Love God the more He will change me.  The more God changes me, for His purposes, then I will be able to glorify Him and honor Him better, living out my Love for God.

So I come to a conclusion that I need humble myself.  So that I can Love God more which should result in glorifying God in a life of worship.

What about you?

Pastor Bruce

Where is the Love?

Even though I think that the black eyed peas did a good job on the song "where is the love" that is not my inspiration for today's post.  I would love to think I was that hip and cool but, well, I am not. :) ...  Anyway my mind has been pondering the idea of loving each other and how that is supposed to work.  As Christians we are told, instructed even, to love our enemies, to bless those who persecute you.  This is not only to help on a practical level and diffuse conflict, but also to be a testimony of what Jesus has done in our lives.  People more and more have embraced this idea as a part of their outreach.  I am glad to see people take an active love based approach to reaching out to the lost and hopeless world around us.  It is who we are to be as followers of Jesus.

Yet ...  I am troubled.  We are also instructed to love one another.  To show selfless, care, concern, and service for other believers.  we are to live in healthy community, encouraging people and meeting their needs.  We are to be a people known, not for our political moral stance, not for our scowls and frowns at those who do not measure up, not for our strict rules and policies, not for some legalistic mindset about how life is to be lived.  No we are to be known for our love.  This is to be a reputation not just for how we deal with those outside the Faith, but for how we treat each other inside the Faith.

This means we are to go out of our way, out of our comfort zone, away from our own desires and felt needs and instead to embark on a journey of entering the world of others.   so that we can share true love and encouragement with them.  We are to serve each other and that means we are not to get ourselves into silly petty disagreements about things that are different or new, but are not in anyway against the teaching of Scripture.  Here is a great example, I will pick on the men.

We were in a Church that had men's breakfast events every couple of months and their would be a speaker and some singing and some guys in the kitchen making a big breakfast for everyone.  This was a great time and encouraged a lot of the men.  When it was brought forward that it would be good to have something more often.  The idea was quickly shut down because no one would commit to plan and operate such an event more often.  The guys who brought forward the change then responded that the additional times could be simpler, a time of devotional and prayer then go out to a local restaurant for breakfast.  This was met with a scowl and a response along the lines of we don't expect our guys to go out for breakfast, it would become a burden.  This became a problem, a division among men.  It never should have.  Those guys many years ago may have had good points for discussion on both sides of the argument, but there was no real reason for the argument other than some people like control and do not like anything new.

Instead what should have happened is acts of love.  Love should patiently listen to a new idea, it should respond with kind wisdom and encouragement.  On issues like this we should never take a harsh stance, it is simply not worth it.  I believe people mean well but they do not think through how their response to another person's felt need will be taken.  They may not mean to come across as a person who lacks love and care but in their hasty harsh response they do not realize they have hurt others far more than the issue warranted.  We all need to learn to live in a way that shows healthy love.  I know that most of you are like me and it is not "natural".  That is common because showing love is not out of our personality it is a spiritual issue.  How and why and whether we show love to our brothers and sisters in a proper way is a spiritual issue.

We need to repent of our selfish attitudes, when we respond without love it is my own flesh that is responding.  When we respond properly in a loving way, honoring Christ, then it is Jesus in us showing up and responding.  This should be our desire, not to allow our natural person to show up and cause problems.

So let us live in humble repentance, seeking to build one another up in the Faith with encouragement and Love.

Walk on together!

Pastor Bruce

Courage and Corruption

Today's sermon will come from John 2:13-25, and the theme is going to be "corruption".   It can be a challenging topic.  Often we apply this word to those in positions of power, sayings like "power corrupts & absolute power corrupts absolutely", are common in our modern culture.  Yet I believe the Truth is far closer to home and far deeper in perspective.

Corruption starts with our sinful selfish state.  Acts of sin are an outflow of our self centered nature we all receive as humans, passed on through our fathers because of the curse of the fall in Genesis.  This sin and its outcomes will cause corruption if it is left unchecked.  If no one brings correction and there is no repentance, the act of remorse and change from our sinful direction, then corruption will seep in.  Corruption will eventually take power and authority and much damage will be done.  Common examples we hear about have to do with money, lies and sex.  But corruption can often fly beneath the radar for a long time.

Lets consider that people often do not like change.  So instead of listening, praying and responding to God and the voice of the Holy Spirit.  They make decisions based on what is "normal" or what is comfortable or easy.  Yet if we are seeking to make decisions on our own, then we are sinning.  If we have allowed such sinful practices to take control then corruption has set in and we are headed for trouble.

Anytime we are allowing our sin nature to be in a position of control we are in danger of corrupt behavior and decision making.  Even things that seem harmless and acceptable can have deep consequences because we are not seeking to live under the Lordship of Christ.  I am not saying that this is easy to avoid.  It is hard.

We must be courageous, we must make the hard decisions to follow God and seek His voice, regardless of what "we want".  Our own selves should not be the barometer for our decision making.  Our likes, dislikes, emotions and traditions can not be trusted.  God can be trusted.  So please join with me in a stand to be courageous.  Let us be Honest about our fears, hopes, dreams, challenges, etc.. yet let us walk with Integrity, not allowing such things to have a hold on us.  May we be Transparent, not hiding our weakness and failures, but having a true spirit of humility so that God is glorified in us.

As we take on the path of courage, in following Jesus fully.  Part of the path is for us to show great amounts of grace to our brothers and sisters who are struggling with their own selfishness and weakness.  We are to walk with them and help them, not slaughter them like enemies.  Such a negative attitude is from our prideful selves, please do not hold up righteousness in order to damage your brothers and sisters.  True courage to follow Christ sets His glory first and follows the Biblical model for how we are to grow together.

Walk with humble courage!

Pastor Bruce

Attitude

"but in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as Holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect."

1 Peter 3:15 (ESV)

As I have been reading, praying and pondering this morning, I saw this verse come up as the verse of the day on Youversion.  What a great reminder not only to place the Holiness of Jesus in your hearts and minds.  But also for us to be growing in wisdom.

Wisdom is more than knowledge, it is knowledge applied and contained within an attitude of humility.  We are not to be prepared to make a defense with prideful war drums.  rather a defense with respect and a gentle spirit.  This passage is about how we respond to those who question us about the Hope we live with and express.  This Hope is found in Jesus and His completed work on the Cross.

So when a non-Christian inquires about what you believe, even if they are antagonistic we are not to join in that type of attitude.  Instead we are to gently and humbly present Truth.  This can be difficult but we should strive for it.

The bigger challenge for us I think is that we need to employ the same attitude within Christianity as well.  We need to grow and practice this with each other.  Often we as Christians have a tendency to be harsh with each other when we are questioned about something we believe.  Yet if we  are  to respond in this attitude of gentleness and respect to those who do not know Christ, then how should we respond to others that have Jesus as their Lord?  

We are to treat each other better than we treat non-believers.  We are to love one another with a humble heart as it honors God and is a testimony to others.  So I would ask you to take up this challenge with me.  Let's strive to treat one another with healthy respect and a gentle spirit.  Let's not be harsh with one another.  Let's stay away from attempts at humor at a brother or sister's expense.  Sure we will have differences and we want to laugh but let's not hurt each other in the process.

Remember that as a Christian Jesus resides in us by the power of the Holy Spirit.  The same Lord and Master for us all.  Let's not mis-treat His servants, His Children.

Let us walk together!

Pastor Bruce

Family Time

Family, often such a misunderstood concept in our culture today.  I could go into a long discussion about my thoughts on the current culture but instead I want to take a moment to share my current pondering.  

I love family, I love the idea of family, I love experiencing family.  Family is a beautiful God given gift for us.  A set of relationships wherein we can find love, compassion, care, encouragement, laughter, tears, comfort, strength, life, mourning, sadness, and a true sense of community among other things.  I know no family is perfect, in fact I think all of them are a bit messy in one way or another.  

I got to spend time with a very special part of my family tonight.  Time with my wonderful wife, two sons, daughter (in-law) and yet-born grand child.  Such a great and close family.  Warms my heart.  Are we perfect ... NOPE!  But even when things get tough we will always love each other and be there for one another.  

As I pondered family, my mind regularly flashes to different people.  Many of them as close a part of our family as anyone and yet we are not blood related, at least not close "blood-relatives".  We all have the same common ancestors in Adam and Eve but we do not necessarily share last names or grand parents.  I have so many family members that I often long to spend time with.  They are all over the world.  Some are my parents, grand parents, brothers, sisters, etc... but so many are close to me because we are part of the family of God.  god brought us together and connected us.

Some people who are family to me I have spent very little time with, and yet I feel a close bond to them.  Others I have had the honor of spending a lot of time with.  All are so very special to me.  I am glad we have such modern technology so that I can try and stay connected with them.   

Here in Brandon where I have been only a short time, I have already been finding more family.  I love discovering all of the family members God has for me to meet up with.  This family idea is amazing, a great opportunity to make sure others know they are valued and cared for.  We are so blessed that God gave us this model.  I pray that we learn to embrace it better.

Find someone to encourage every day, if the day is not yet over find another one and then repeat.

Blessings,

Pastor Bruce

Love - Valentines Day?

Today it is Valentines day, named after Saint Valentine as a day to remember those we love dearly.  If you want to look at the history behind it, feel free to google it.  Our culture has taken Valentines day and made it all about "romance".  This is not a bad thing in general but often I find the real point of love is missed.

Love, true "Love" is much much larger than "romance".  It is meant to be selfless, giving and not looking to receive.  The Truest form of Love is learned from God, as Jesus is our prime example of this Love.  We learn that Love is a commitment more than a feeling.  We learn to love not only those who love us but those who do not.  We begin to understand that hard work of loving during times when the people we are caring for are not treating us well.  When we seek to Love like Jesus, then we begin to understand what Love really is about. 

Sure for couples romance is a part of their Love, God gave them those emotions and desires, it is good for married couples to enjoy their romance.  To those who are single this day is a great opportunity to be reminded of the Love God has shown you.  The great Love that you can show to your family, friends, neighbors, co-workers and even strangers, can become your focus.  Take the day and redeem it to use for God's glory.

Let us all walk together in unity and Love, the same Jesus resides in all of His people and as such we are united.  Regardless of our marital status, age, race, culture, as Christians we are the Family of God.

Pastor Bruce